Coming Out

Tears of joy rolled down my cheeks,
as my friends tried to calm me down.
"It's Okay," they said,
looking at my most vulnerable state.

It's as though a heavy weight has just been lifted.
and the word "freedom" is starting to exist in my world.
That "hope" I've always had deep in me,
is starting to glow brighter and brighter
.

That time, we were discussing about the subliminal messages behind Disney cartoons,
A friend of mine, Vivi, later on suggested that Disney should make a movie with gay/lesbian characters.
A while later, the British girl, Helen who I caught a glimpse of back then, looked into space and said,
"you know what, I've never had a gay friend."

At that instant, I took my chance and mustered all my courage to tell them.
I looked right into her eyes, hoping that I won't entangle my tongue and said,
"I'm Gay."
Her reaction was really funny, actually, she nearly shouted it out in surprise,
not knowing that the boy who sat right beside her was actually Gay. 

The last time I came out to my Arab friends
was one amazing night.
because,
I came out to my close friends officially.

I have always tried to hint my friends that I like guys,
but I have never actually came out to them.
They were Muslims, and so,
that seemed a little impossible for them to accept me.

I love my friends,
they are like treasure and are very precious to me.
To lose any one of them
is the last thing I'll ever want.  

That night, while looking through pictures of a celebrity who announced that he is gay,
my friend "cried" "Nooooooo, well, you can have him now" or something similar to that.
I looked at her, straight into her eyes, shocked and speechless.
In my mind, I have always thought that they believed I was joking.

I questioned her again,
and they seemed totally fine with it.

The supporting words I heard from them moved my heart
and made me cry.
I was so happy, so happy...
I can't even explain those feeling in words.

"You don't have to care about other people's opinions,",
"I really respect you for being brave and being yourself",
"That's who you are"
"We don't judge people"

These people, who I call friends,
are finally a part of my life entirely.
Friends?
I guess it's more like family now.

The words "I really respect you for being brave and being yourself", still echoes in my mind <3
and days later, they actually stood up for me when I was being targeted for being Gay
even though it was just a joke. I finally feel secure and happy.